The WOKE Corporation

Once again, Mark Latham absolutely nails it.

Woke Capitalism and Woke Marketing is not about 'aligning values' with progressive causes. It's about wolves in sheep's clothing (Big Business) exploiting the Fools of the Left and getting them of the Capitalist's backs.

Latham is one of our sharpest, most incisive minds with the rare trait of cutting through BS and calling it as it is.

One was once a critic of Latham, while he was in the ALP rubbishing our US alliance (who remembers 'A Conga-Line of Suckholes'?), but today he's a more realistic, practical thinker.

This piece he's written explains why your once-favorite shaver blade, sneaker, airline or breakfast cereal has decided to embrace virtue signalling.


The WOKE "generation"


 
HOW TO UNDERSTAND THE RISE OF THE WOKE CORPORATION
Mark Latham's Outsiders 12 July at 13:31

In the Cancel Culture Revolution now underway, the role of woke corporations continues to defy rational belief.

Even the sharpest of political analysts are struggling to explain the strange newfound unity-ticket between big business and so-called ‘progressive causes’.

It is commonly thought the Left has captured a cadre of corporate executives and brainwashed them in support of wacko stuff like renewable energy, identity politics, gender fluidity, Black Lives Matter and pulling down statues that hitherto had only attracted the interest of pigeons.

But what if the opposite is true? That corporations are using Leftist causes for their own purposes, as a useful distraction from the exploitation of workers and customers?

Put yourself in the shoes of a banking executive. For years your company has been ripping off its customers, even those that are dead.

The unions were always demanding pay increases and objecting to job losses as the bank automated its services.

Occasionally, a Federal MP, a Green or someone from the Labor Left, would suggest re-regulating the financial sector or worse, in terms of profitability, increasing market competition.

You’re living in a beautiful harbourside house with a yacht moored at a Hawkesbury River inlet and another at Rose Bay.

These are glorious weekend getaways but still, it’s annoying to be named in the Banking Royal Commission and for MPs and union reps to be talking about ‘monopoly capital’ and ‘greedy capitalists’.

Goodness, someone might even mention it at a Point Piper dinner party one night.

You are desperately looking for a solution to this repetitional conundrum.

Here at Mark Latham's Outsiders, we have reconstructed the internal memo guiding the banker’s new strategy. It reads like this:

"Clearly the smart thing to do is adopt a couple of the tokenistic causes of the Left, to get them off our back, while continuing to rip off our customers and employees.

If we do it well enough, we could become media darlings. Wouldn’t that be a turn around? A spin-doctor’s delight, and it seems eminently possible.

For some strange reason, the Left appears to have lost genuine interest in class struggle.

They used to talk about toppling capitalism but now the only thing they are trying to pull down are a couple of statues up the road in Hyde Park.

What a pack of fools. Here we are making a squillion dollars a year by exploiting the public, so how good is it that the Lefties don’t seem to notice anymore?

They have moved on to a new set of ‘problems’ (LOL) like Coon Cheese, who moves first at chess and boycotting JK Rowling.

When was the last time an Australian trade union went on strike? These people have lost their commitment to industrial muscle and worker gains; they are totally obsessed with race, gender and sexuality.

To ‘soften our image’ and look sympathetic to this agenda, it’s pretty straightforward: just do a few symbolic things with little impact on our mega profits and executive salaries.

Sourcing the bank’s office lighting plan from renewables is a harmless place to start. The electricity has got to come from somewhere, so why not the imagery of saving the planet?

We could also sponsor a koala habitat or two, with the PR people setting up some nice cuddly shots.

As for the unions, their soft underbelly is feminism. Someone like Sally McManus is supposed to be a socialist, but if we tell her the bank has introduced gender employment quotas she’ll forget about any radical stuff and start supporting us.

A few more women around the place won’t matter, as eventually they’ll be restructured out anyway.

We can also set up a Diversity and Inclusion Unit – DNI they call it. This means 0.1 percent of our staff will be working on this diversity BS, making the Left very happy, while the other 99.9 percent will still be on basic bank wages stealing money from dead people. How good is that!

To buy off the pooncy academics and also the Human Rights Commission, our DNI unit could commission Tim Bowl-of-Soup (I can never spell his real name) to do a report on the need for more Asian bank tellers. It might actually help, as Chinese are supposed to be good at maths.

Read on here

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